What Lies Beneath the Surface...

I've been thinking about how I would describe Before I Let Go since the first few chapters. Marieke Nijkamp created a story that was MUCH different than what I had been expecting. Based on the description, and its categorization as YA Lit, I was expecting a straightforward mystery.

What I Thought It Was About...

Two girls, Corey and Kyra, have grown up in Lost, Alaska. In a community of around 200 people, there aren't many secrets kept nor differences unnoticed. While Corey fits into the community, Kyra has always been the black sheep- particularly after her diagnosis of Bipolar disorder. The town doesn't understand how to accept Kyra's unpredictable moods or mania-induced flights into the woods. Throughout their lives, Corey has been Kyra's only support, and even she struggles to be what her closest friend needs.

After Corey moves away, and Kyra has been deserted in Lost for months, she discovers that Kyra has committed suicide...and she seems to be the only one who's upset about it.

Imagine My Surprise...

What unfolds next is where my expectations went out the window. Corey's return to Lost opens her up to secrets that she never knew existed, and she is forced to ask some ugly questions (and get even uglier answers) in her search for truth.

In the interest of being honest, I'm still not really sure whether I actually LIKED the novel. However, it's undeniable that it brings up some truly important themes for both adult and young adult readers to think about. Before I Let Go isn't just a mystery about young girl's tragic death; it has some beautiful moments that make the reader think about the nature of mental illness and how society accepts or shuns those with a disorder.

Even within the confines of Corey and Kyra's relationship, Kyra continues to fight the battle of being more than a diagnosis. I think that Nijkamp makes a poignant statement when Kyra makes the point that she wants to be loved not because of, or in spite of, her diagnosis. Kyra wants a life where she is loved and accepted for all the good, bad, and terrible that is her life and battle with bipolar disorder.

Nijkamp's novel also tackles what it means to be an outsider whether you were born one or became one.

I think this is a very important conversation to have, and, as a teacher, I really see the value of students being exposed to literature that will make them question their own acceptance and perception of those who are different. Before I Let Go begs the question of whether we respect, accept, and love those who don't fit society's mold or if they're simply drained for our benefit and abandoned.

While the novel tries to end on an almost hopeful note, it's not a "feel good" novel. It's thought-provoking and meaningful, so be prepared for what you'll find inside.